Advice From a Therapist: How to Hire a Therapist
It is my intention with this post to help someone who is wanting to improve their mental health navigate and understand how to find the best therapist for themself. I’m a firm believer that mental health, although invisible, is just as important as physical health. The mind is powerful and affects all aspects of life. Everyone deserves to be connected to the best professional for themself to take good care of it.
When I first started seeking therapy, I leaned on my high school girlfriend and also Licensed Clinical Social Worker in Arkansas, Kayley Walker. I had, of course, always shared my troubles with Kayley as besties do, and it was fortunate for me that she was also trained to identify what type of help I needed. I am so grateful to Kayley for helping me find my soulmate of a therapist who has completely changed my life. She gave me the insider’s playbook on how to find the right one. And today she’s joining me so we can do the same for you!
Let’s jump in!
Being the boss that you are, you’re going to interview them like you would interview potential employees for a job position. Plan to spend about a month to three months arranging meetings. These can be done over the phone. They will also want to do this to make sure that you’re a good fit and they believe they can help you. This consultation is free. Together we compiled a list of questions to ask:
Are you taking new clients? What kind of client issues would you see as being beyond the scope of your practice?
Do you accept my insurance? (Know your provider before calling.)
Are you available at the times I am available? (Know your ideal times before calling. Keep in mind, you will likely need/want a few minutes after each session before jumping into the next thing so try to plan accordingly.)
How do you collaborate with clients to set goals and develop a treatment plan?
How do you approach understanding and respecting the cultural backgrounds and identities of your clients?
What strategies do you use to create a safe and inclusive space for individuals?
What methods or modalities do you use to help clients process and heal from traumatic experiences? More on this in a bit!
Prepare a brief synopsis of what got you here to this call. From childhood to now, what are those big life events? What brings you in? This does not need to be every detail, but enough to give them an idea if their area of expertise matches what you need. Have the bullet points written down.
If you identify as neurodiverse, it’s important to ask about the therapist’s experience in treating individuals with similar needs. Seeking guidance from professionals well-versed in Autism Spectrum Disorders or Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), for example, can help you find the right therapeutic approach.
Know if you want virtual or in-person. Either way, search for a therapist and filter by insurance on psychologytoday.com. Then, you’ll want to filter by therapeutic approach. This is where Kayley stepped in to helped with what felt like a daunting task. She says, “Choosing the right therapeutic approach can be challenging. There are numerous frameworks to consider.”
Note: At times, individuals seek therapy with the intention of fostering a more profound connection with themselves. One does not have to be experiencing something emotionally intense in order to seek support.
Therapeutic Approaches
There are numerous types of therapy modalities and approaches designed to address a wide range of mental health concerns and personal development goals. Some of the most well-known therapy frameworks include:
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) teaches mindfulness skills to accept and manage distressing thoughts and feelings. Imagine your thoughts as leaves on a stream floating down a river or like clouds passing by…
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) focuses on changing negative thought patterns and behaviors to improve emotional well-being. Change your thoughts, change you life.
Couple’s Therapy aims to enhance the relationship between partners and address conflicts such as Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) which aims to improve attachment and emotional bonds within relationships and is often regarded as one of the leading approaches for couples therapy due to its effectiveness.
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) combines cognitive-behavioral techniques with mindfulness to manage intense emotions. The tagline for Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is “A Life Worth Living.” DBT was developed by Dr. Marsha Linehan and focuses on helping individuals develop skills to manage emotions, tolerate distress, improve relationships, and create a more fulfilling life.
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a psychotherapy approach designed to help individuals process and heal from traumatic experiences and distressing memories.
Family Therapy focuses on resolving issues within family dynamics and improving communication. Learn to harmonize your family’s ecosystem.
Humanistic Therapy encourages self-exploration and personal growth to achieve self-actualization. You are who you’ve been searching for.
Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy examines and harmonizes different aspects of the self to promote healing. It’s considered to be a non-pathologizing approach. If you are interested in this type of therapy, check out the movie Inside Out! Dr. Richard Schwartz, the founder of the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model, collaborated with the creators of the movie Inside Out. The movie’s portrayal of how emotions and thoughts interact within the mind bears some similarities to the IFS framework. You Are More Than the Sum of Your Parts.
Mindfulness-Based Therapies uses mindfulness techniques to promote self-awareness and stress reduction. Breathe in, breathe out. Notice how often you may be holding your breath. The breath is the bridge between your mind and body. Slow down your exhale.
Narrative Therapy helps individuals reframe their personal stories to promote empowerment and resilience. Rewrite your own script. Learn to embrace your authenticity and unblend from living out someone’s else’s myth about you.
Play Therapy utilizes play to help children express themselves and work through emotional difficulties. Toys are their words and play is their language.
Psychodynamic Therapy explores unconscious thoughts and past experiences to understand current behaviors and emotions. Bring your dream journal! You’re going to go deep.
Solution-Focused Brief Therapy concentrates on finding solutions and setting goals in a short timeframe. The tagline for this modality is, “Finding Solutions. Creating Change.” Your therapists will be your biggest cheerleader.
Somatic Psychotherapies addresses psychological issues through an awareness of bodily sensations, such as Somatic Experiencing and Body-Mind Centering. “The body says what words cannot.” - Dr. Bessel van der Kolk. You gotta feel it to heal it!
These are just a few examples, and there are many more therapy modalities designed to cater to different individuals and their unique needs. Therapists often select or integrate modalities based on their clients’ preferences, concerns, and goals.
Evidenced-based considerations:
Research indicates that the mind-body connection plays a crucial role in healing, particularly in practices like somatic therapy. Somatic therapy focuses on the body’s sensations to address emotional and psychological issues, demonstrating its effectiveness in reducing symptoms of trauma and stress-related disorders. Similarly, IFS therapy, which examines the relationships between different aspects of the self, has shown promising results in treating trauma, anxiety, and depression. These approaches emphasize the significance of integrating physical and psychological aspects for overall well-being.
You know what’s interesting?
Research says that the way you attune with your therapist can really make a difference in how well your treatment goes. They’ve even put percentages to it:
Michael Lambert’s therapeutic alliance model emphasizes that around 40% of the factors influencing therapy outcomes are labeled as “client variables and extratherapeutic events.” This term basically covers situations where the reasons for improvement aren’t entirely clear, like when clients experience positive changes due to things like getting a new job, or the act of choosing therapy triggering internal healing. The important thing is that the client feels better, even if we’re unsure why.
The second most significant factor, accounting for 30%, is referred to as “The therapeutic relationship.” This means how well you connect with and build a working alliance with your therapist matters a lot. While this might seem obvious, it’s essential to consider when selecting a therapist. In a nutshell: it’s all about the bond you form with your therapist that’s the big player in making therapy work – kind of like a dynamic duo for positive results!
So, what about the remaining 30%? About 15% of the equation involves “Expectancy and placebo effects.” If you have confidence in the therapy process, it’s more likely to be successful. Participation and engagement matters. Trusting your therapist probably amplifies this effect. Interestingly, only 15% of the pie is allocated to “How the therapist has been trained.” This suggests that despite the therapist’s training in a specific therapy style, it doesn’t contribute as significantly to outcomes. This is because most therapy styles seem to be equally effective.
“The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.” Dr. Carl Jung
When seeking a good match:
It’s crucial to approach it as an evaluation process and pay attention to your body’s signals before, during, and after the consultation. Allow yourself time to settle into the moment and ask: do I sense a connection? Was I treated with respect and truly heard?
People often tend to stick with the initial person they contact, and the same applies when choosing a dentist or primary care provider. However, initiating contact doesn’t mean you’re locked in. It’s perfectly acceptable to reconsider! You possess the expertise in understanding your mind and body.
Remember that your comfort and trust in the therapist are essential. Feel free to ask any questions that help you gauge their expertise and alignment with your needs related to diversity training and cultural understanding.
You’ve got this!
Engaging in therapy demands a lot of courage. Starting the journey can frequently be the toughest part, but we have optimism that this information will assist you as you take your first step towards healing. Lean into the part of you that is open and curious about staring this journey.
Special thanks to Kayley for sharing her expertise and helping to make this post possible.
Check out Rekindle LLC by Kayley Walker, MSW, LCSW for ongoing art coupled with therapy resources.
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